notes #5: giving it all to be young again

Lately, I’ve been seeing lots of discussions where people say they will give anything in the world to be young again.

And it got me thinking: people spend their entire youth making money, chasing status, and more — and yet they’re willing to sacrifice all of it to get back their youth. The irony.

Seneca, a well-known philosopher, shares more ironies like this in one of his writings — On the Shortness of Life:

• Men do not let anyone seize their estates, and if there is the slightest dispute about their boundaries they rush to stones and arms; but they allow others to encroach on their lives - why, they themselves even invite in those who will take over their lives.

• But nobody works out the value of time: men use it lavishly as if it cost nothing. But if death threatens these same people, you will see them praying to their doctors; if they are in fear of capital punishment, you will see them prepared to spend their all to stay alive.

And the most common one of all: we sacrifice our health in pursuit of wealth, only to use that wealth gained to fix our health.

So I came up with a few questions to think about:

• Why does life feel so short?

• What exactly is your youth for? What is considered a youth well spent? What is considered a good life?

• What is the role / meaning of death?

Why does life feel so short?

Oftentimes, I feel like I just don’t have enough time to do the things I really want to do, that I have to defer to practical concerns.

But if I were to examine closely, I could definitely identify a couple of things that I should stop doing. Unfortunately, it feels like those things need to be done — what I call practical concerns like making money, building connections, being part of various social activities.

And to be fair, I don’t exactly hate doing those stuff — it’s just I would rather do other things. And also I wasn’t forced into it — it was a conscious choice to take the conventional comfortable route.

A short life is not necessarily numerically short. It’s one that is short because most of the time just past you by.

This idea is something I learnt through The Immortalists, a fictional story of 4 kids living their lives differently given knowledge of their death.

The novel plays with the idea that our perception of time is shaped by how we live:

• Simon’s life feels full despite its brevity because he lived passionately.

• Klara’s pursuit of magic suggests that time can be bent—through belief, memory, and storytelling.

• Daniel tries to control fate but finds that life slips through his fingers regardless.

• Varya’s longevity makes life feel even shorter, as she realizes too late that avoiding risk did not stop time from moving.

Ultimately, life feels short because we are always moving toward an ending, whether we acknowledge it or not. The awareness of time slipping away makes it seem faster.

So the question becomes: what is considered a waste (or a life well-lived)?

A good life, according to The Immortalists, is not measured by length but by depth. Each sibling defines it differently.

• Simon finds fulfillment in passion and love, even if it means a short life.

• Klara believes a good life is one filled with wonder and belief in the impossible, even at the cost of stability.

• Daniel, who initially seeks security and control, realizes too late that he has let fear dictate his choices.

• Varya, the longest-lived, prioritizes longevity and health but ultimately questions whether avoiding risk has made her life meaningful.

The novel suggests that a good life is not one-size-fits-all but is instead defined by the individual's ability to live in alignment with their values and desires. However, it also warns that obsession—whether with longevity, security, or fulfillment—can be its own prison.

This reminds me of a video I’ve recently seen — that we only have to please two people in our lives: our 8-year old self and our 80-year old self.

The former wants us to chase our dreams while the latter wants us to find peace but both wants us to be happy and be ourselves.

While sounding like a simple task, it’s actually extremely difficult to find the balance. And for the most of us (right now), we spend the better part of our lives just trying to figure this out.

And despite searching for some time now, I’m still not quite sure. And I don’t think I’ll ever figure it out. But what I know so far is this:

Build something truly yours slowly.

Keep doing something that you care about for a long time so that the compounding effects occur and something extraordinary happens.

Don’t waste time.

A lot of the time we waste are the result of fear, or perceived responsibilities like hanging out with people we don’t respect and admire to gain their validation, or staying at a dead-end job, or constantly feeding our addictions.

And don’t worry about how much time you’re left with. Just treasure every moment, as Seneca puts it succinctly.

The value of death

In The Immortalists, death is not just an ending but a force that shapes how people live. Knowing the supposed date of their deaths influences each sibling in different ways, but for all of them, the knowledge forces a reckoning with what matters.

• For Simon, the awareness of death gives him permission to fully embrace his identity and desires.

• Klara turns death into art, using magic as a way to explore the thin line between reality and illusion.

• Daniel fights against it, but in doing so, loses sight of living.

• Varya, by fearing death, inadvertently traps herself in a life of stagnation.

The novel suggests that the certainty of death gives life urgency and meaning. Without an ending, there would be no reason to take risks, love deeply, or create something lasting. It is the contrast between life and death that makes every moment precious.

For most of us, death is an uncertainty.

But here is one question that helped me gain some clarity:

• How would you live differently if you knew your death date? Would it change if it’s soon or if it’s far away?

Remember that the presence of loss makes something more valuable.

• Losing a friend or family makes us regret not spending more time with them.

• Losing our health makes us regret not taking care of it better.

But yet when we have it, we choose to neglect them. Embrace our human nature for what it is and remind yourself of this every day.

Seneca sees death as a reminder that time is our most precious resource. The fact that life is finite gives it urgency and meaning—it forces us to prioritize what truly matters. If life were endless, we might postpone everything important.

He also argues that fearing death is irrational because it is a natural part of life. Instead of dreading it, we should use its certainty as motivation to live fully, making each moment count.

In essence, death is not the enemy—it is the reason to live well now.

Cheers,
Joesurf

💡 Inspiration of the Week

Believe me, it is the sign of a great man, and one who is above human error, not to allow his time to be frittered away: he has the longest possible life simply because whatever time was available he devoted entirely to himself.

— Seneca

🧠 Weekly Notes

📖 Book — On the Shortness of Life by Seneca:

• Life feels short only if wasted; true fulfillment comes from using time wisely.

• Focus on meaningful pursuits rather than distractions and trivialities.

📖 Book — The Immortalists by Chloe Benjamin:

• Four siblings learn the dates of their deaths from a fortune teller, shaping how they live their lives.

• Explores fate, free will, and the psychological burden of knowing one’s end.